2018 I had 71 blog posts, which is the only double digit year I have had since my first year of blogging (every other year was three digits), with good reason. I did a lot in my personal life, I had a lot going on that took me away and did not give me much time on my computer to sit down and go through pictures (which is how I know what to blog about usually), not to mention the latter half of the year I was consumed with getting the house ready to sell and then buying our new home.
My word for 2018 was FOCUS (with the end in mind), which I divided into four parts:
Parenting-I think that I struggled so much with this this past year. I am getting better about involving the kids as they get older with chores and helping around the house and that is still a work in progress but the twins have helped me clean bathrooms and the kids love to vacuum and my kids can all unload a dishwasher so it wasn't a total loss. My biggest struggle was finding time for little d since he is gone for the longest amount of time during the day and then wants to be with friends or just out of the house instead of hanging out with us, BUT I will say that buying more family games (or getting them like our favorite SUSHI GO!) has really helped us to bond as a family.
Turning Learning to Teaching-I did take the time to finish quite a few books this year on my own which was not easy. I continued to read the Old Testament but transitioned at the end of the year into New Testament (thanks to Come Follow Me, which is seriously an answer to prayers for knowing what to teach my kids for family night and just in general during the week!). I have been hit and miss with waking up early to study but when I do it sets the tone for the rest of my day and I love that.
Creating-Unfortunately my artmaking has really stalled this year. I don't know what else to say, but I still enjoy working in my sketchbook with my kids on Sundays and at least I have that time, even if I am just making cartoons. This year I felt like since losing the naps with the twins (even with them being in prek, which I really just ended up using that time to prep the house for moving so I never truly got to enjoy that time as "me" time), I struggled with getting time to be creative. But I still was able to carve time out for reading because of how much I love reading and found some really good books, so I am okay that this part of my focus took the backburner this year.
Being an Athlete-I started going to Fieldhouse fitness and spin which I loved both and felt amazing. I did a half dozen Whole30s (I could do those perfectly) but then struggled with how to "food freedom forever" post-whole30. I went on two whole30 retreats and even contemplated becoming a whole30 coach because man did I know my whole30 stuff...but it never felt right. Then the path I was on lead me to discovering Intuitive eating and the Health at Every Size movement and I felt like THIS, this was what felt right to me. (sorry whole30!). Unfortunately as I mentioned earlier, I allowed my health in general (Skipping meals, eating out, skipping workouts--gasp!) to fall by the wayside and gained a good 20 pounds at the latter half of the year. Part of that came from being upset/depressed that I would not be able to get a tummy tuck in the near future (because we were moving and our house was expensive and we would be using our savings on that instead of elective surgery, which threw me into a couple months funk I finally snapped out of in December). I disregarded my self-care and paid the price, one that will take probably all of 2019 to recover from, but I am at peace with that. I am at peace with the way my body looks and feels even if it is not where it should be because I know it will not last forever, and it was worth it at the time to make my Utah house look as perfect as possible. I will recover and I will find my athletic space in the next year and my definition of beauty and healthy has been broadened and my eyes have been opened, which I am so grateful for. I am giving myself grace for the first half of 2019 as my body recovers and I learn to find my balance again.
My biggest regret this past year was allowing my self care to fall by the wayside the latter half of 2018, mostly because I felt like the things I had to get done were so important I allowed them to consume me completely, which looking back was probably why I had some significant struggles with balance. Also not spending more quality time with little d.
My biggest accomplishments for 2018 were: earning about 40 relicensure points, potty training the twins (which was LIFE CHANGING), getting the twins in prek (which I never thought we would do), starting the big kids in a charter school (that was based on Covey's habits of highly effective leaders), prepping the house to sell (pretty much entirely on my own... I treated it like my full time job!) and then buying a new home.
So going into 2019, my word for the new year is CHARITY.
I struggled the most with my word this year than I have since I started doing a single word a year. I flirted with a few other words but this was the one that I just kept coming back to.
Charity is defined in scriptures as "The Pure Love of Christ", "Conquers all", "To give", among other things. I felt like it was the missing puzzle piece I was missing so badly in my life.
CHARITY FOR SELF- in the form of compassion for myself and giving myself grace and forgiveness on a daily basis. Acknowledging that I am not perfect and allowing myself to keep trying instead of allowing that imperfection to paralyze me. Because it is only once I truly learn to love myself that I can truly love others.
CHARITY FOR MY SPOUSE AND KIDS- treating the most important people in my life like they are the most important people in my life, which is easy to forget about in the hustle and bustle of the day to day. Specifically to reduce the yelling in my house and increase the acts of kindness.
LEARNING MORE ABOUT CHRIST-Christ was the epitome of charity, and I hope that by learning more about him through reading about his life and teachings I can be a more Christlike person and this can help me with the other two aspects of my goals.
CHARITY FOR OTHERS OUTSIDE OUR HOME- to look for ways myself or my family can bless the lives of others around us, to be aware of those who need help or love, and to seek out those who can be blessed by us because we are so very blessed and I want to make sure we share our blessings with those around us.
This is by far the most spiritually based resolution and I hesitate even putting it out there because I feel like this will be the most challenging resolution I have ever made even if it seems so simple, but I feel like I have been lead to this word in the same way I have been led to this home in Indiana. Let's do this.
Showing posts with label resolutions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label resolutions. Show all posts
Saturday, February 9, 2019
Wednesday, January 17, 2018
2018 New Year's Resolution: FOCUS
I am SO excited for the new year. (still!) I know I haven't talked about my new year's resolutions but I have been working on them which has been a point of sanity and a compass for my daily life lately. Last year's word was DISCOVER, which I loved till the end, and 2018's word is FOCUS. I have a lot of things going on in my life and it definitely takes a lot for me to sit down and focus on something. I am making every attempt to take full advantage of my 1020 minutes a day I am not spending sleeping (which is also wishful thinking on my part, to get 7 hours of sleep at night, but hey its a goal!).\
2018: FOCUS with the end in mind
1. Parenting (1 on 1, healthy meals, good habits, involve in work): My goal every year is to be a better parent than I was last year, especially since I am fully capable of being present with my kids seeing as how I am not pregnant or taking care of babies. I am hoping to set good examples to them of behaviors and patterns I hope they will follow and I also hope to make them a more active part of keeping our house tidy. I read on a friend's blog that part of their morning routine as a family was to empty the dishwasher together before making breakfast and eating together and as someone who barely gets to eat breakfast in the morning because I am washing dishes/emptying or loading the dishwasher/doing any number of kitchen chores, this is very appealing to me. It does require me to wake up the kids (and myself!) a bit earlier than usual but I think it would be worth it. I have already started trying to incorporate the kids into helping me post-meal by letting them wipe down the table or bring me dishes or load the dishwasher. For someone who feels like I am completely overwhelmed with cleaning all the time, this is a nice break. And obviously planning healthy meals and encouraging my kids to participate in healthy snack choices as well are on the top of my list. First on my list, however, is one on one time. It is nearly impossible to give each of my kids the time with me that they want, one on one, every single day. I would have no time for myself or Drew or anything else I need to do (hello laundry!). So I am giving myself a break and trying for just 5 minutes. 5 minutes of reading, connecting, doing whatever I or they want to do every day (which will probably differ on the daily) just them and myself. I am not always 4/4 but I am usually at least 2/4 so there is plenty of room for improvement.
2. Learning->Teaching (Time with kids and by myself): This goes along with my first goal where I want to always be learning. I want to teach my kids and learn alongside them (I really need to start prek stuff with my twins since they are very interested!) as well as continuing on my road to relicensure. I also found out last year that I do really well studying in the morning before the kids wake up, so I need to get back to doing that.
3. Creating (Time with kids and by myself): I need to be better about making "creative time" for myself and the kids. To make stuff or draw or paint or do playdoh that isn't just me giving them something to occupy them so I can make dinner or clean (which right now I feel like is all I do in the kitchen lately).
4. Being an athlete (workouts, food for fuel, Mutu, physical therapy): I feel really lucky that "going to the gym" is not a hassle or necessary goal setting measure for me. What I do need to worry about is everything inbetween that helps me feel better on the regular which is why starting the year with a Whole30 was so important for me.
Sunday, December 31, 2017
looking back at 2017 resolutions
This last year for me was all about DISCOVERY.
Discovering:
Joy in parenting/motherhood/being a wife. I don't know how I thought I would really be able to measure this (so much for a SMART goal!) but 2016 was such a struggle to keep it all together that I REALLY wanted to reconnect and be happy in my role as mom and wife. I feel like getting my head above water with the twins (thanks to them being a little older and more independent) had a part to do with that. Also all the other aspects that I focused on this year.
The Old Testament. This was really a two-fold resolution since in 2016 I barely had two spare moments to myself. I only got through up to Leviticus but I was able to take time more mornings than the previous year (usually had to be around 530 am!) to study OT or whatever else I felt like reading. I started off the year working out before the kids woke up, then Drew took that over the second half of the year which was actually a bit of a relief because the mornings are usually the only guaranteed (mostly) time in my day where I can really be alone. It evolved from just studying/reading up to working on my sketchbook, reading other things, doing my Mutu, and just doing things to get ready for the day. Waking up before the kids, sort of like working out, is something that always feels so hard but I NEVER regret doing it. I hope I can get further into the Old Testament this upcoming year.
My Core. It is certainly not as good as it could be, but it is definitely stronger than it was a year ago, and even six months ago when I was still doing crossfit. I think recognizing my limits due to my weakness was a big step in my core recovering. Lifting as heavy as I could and going as hard as I could did not do any good to my core or my pelvic floor. It was definitely a year of trial and (a lot of) error, but it is a work in progress going in the right direction. My 3 finger gap is now down to 1-2, and while I have not been doing Mutu as regularly as I should, I have been going a couple of times to a massage therapist who has been working on realigning my middle, which has made a huge difference. I did manage to gain 10 pounds in 2017, on top of the extra baby weight I was still carrying, but even with that added stress I still feel stronger in my core and like I have more control than I did a year ago.
Gratitude. I kept a daily gratitude journal for a few months leading up to the move in May which I think helped a lot with dealing with a lot of issues that would have upset me more. I have definitely applied this more in my life than I thought I would and am happy to say that while I still had bad days, days that I would sulk and bemoan what was "happening to me", the more that I took control of the situation, assessed it for the good and then worked on what was lacking, I consistently had better days and could enjoy parenting/life in general.
Myself. This was the one that was the most ominous to me. I wanted to figure out what made me happy beyond what I had to do in my day to day life. I was right about the other parts of my resolution helping me along in this quest...Things I discovered about myself this year:
1. I love being a mom. Parenting well does not always come easily to me but the more I choose to love my children unconditionally and treat them in a way that brings us closer together, the more I enjoy it.
2. I love being married to Drew. It's crazy to think that 1/3 of my life I have been with him and most of that time heavily dependent on him, but he's truly been my rock this past year. Moving away from Ohio and then moving to Utah posed so many unseen challenges we did not anticipate and I felt so lucky to have a partner that felt the same way I did. We definitely grew closer in the last year and especially with The Kidney Stone Incident, I feel even more blessed than ever to have him by my side.
3. I love blogging but I no longer live to blog. I only posted 128 times in 2017, which may seem like a lot but compared to all the other years where I average 300, it was a sharp drop, mostly due to the fact that I made a conscious decision (after quitting my blog forever for two weeks only to come back to it!) to blog when I felt appropriate and not worry too much about the timing of it. I don't have deadlines, I don't get paid to blog x number of times a week, so while I find it important to keep up with what is going on with my life in journal form, I am content to post only occasionally (and the last three months only single digits a month!). This does mean that I take less pictures but they are ones that I care more about instead of ones that I delete right after blogging about them.
4. I really like studying, and morning studying before the kids wake up is just amazing. 5:30 always comes too soon and sometimes (like the last two weeks) it falls to the wayside but since I know my twins are never going to sleep in past 7 ( was thrilled they slept in TILL 7 most days over christmas break!!), it feels better to know I have accomplished a few things before everyone is awake.
5. I HATE being late. HATE it. And I am late ALL THE TIME. Guess who found a good new resolution?
6. Art Education really is the best fit for me. I had some serious doubts before coming to Utah but after attending a few Evening for Educators, I am once again hooked. I know that this is something I have a passion for and I am actually looking into getting a Masters in Art Education with an emphasis in Studio Arts after I recertify (which will hopefully happen in the first half of 2019 if all goes well). I love that I have the same schedule as my kids with school and vacations, get good health benefits, and even get paid to do something that comes easy to me and that I love. That holy trifecta balances out the fact that I would never get paid in my job in a lifetime as much as Drew gets paid after 5 years with his company. And I am okay with that!
7. I love making art. And I have missed making art! I just got back into acrylic painting in the last few months and realized just how badly I missed it. I did contour drawings the other day with little a who was befuddled when I was oohing and awwing at how awesome they looked (her words: "they just look weird."). I made artwork for two shows and I am planning on submitting to the Spring Salon as well as the Autumn show in the fall at the Springville Museum of art. Moving into a blank slate of a house has been intimidating but so much fun as the white space is slowly filling in. Then once I felt a little more settled I got back into my sketchbook and have been loving that time back in a creative zone (yet another resolution for next year!).
8. I need one on one time with my kids. Full disclosure: I am a TERRIBLE mom of four kids. I am a pretty decent mom of one. When I try to take the time to have at least a little one on one time a day with each kid, I am a far better parent than when I just try to parent them all at once all day which is exhausting and not at all rewarding (sorry...but not actually sorry its truth!).
9. I've missed reading. I have a nice little pile of books always at my bedside but for the last few years they were unmoved for the most part. I felt like I had to binge and go through the whole book in a day or else not read it at all! How terrible! I am now content to get a few pages in a book or two a day and feel fulfilled. Also reading more chapter books with little d has been fun!
10. I am very interested in food. Obviously. But specifically in planning for emergencies (I started a food storage which officially just has 55 gallons of water and a can of powdered peanut butter that should last till the kids are in college), which I recently got into. I am working currently on a monthly plan where we can set aside money to spend specifically on food storage or emergency essentials, something I started doing in the last few months of the year. I also start a Whole30 on January 1, 2018 to "clean up" my food act, so to speak. While that will not be something that carries the entire year, I did announce to the family (and we mostly agreed) that our multiple treats a day (sometimes, I know it is terrible!) needed to be brought down to one treat/dessert a week, and that we would not be keeping that sort of junk in the house (we could make it!). With little d getting 6 cavities, it was a real reality hit that even though we rarely drink soda or have fruit snacks or juice, all the other junk our kids eat can really damage their teeth as well as their bodies. Also being told by my dermatologist that having psoriasis increases my risk of developing diabetes is a little kick in the backside that I need to change mine and my families eating habits.
So there you have it... 2017 was a wonderful year full of change and I was so grateful to have discovered so much about myself. I already have plans for 2018 to be a year of FOCUS so stay tuned...
Discovering:
Joy in parenting/motherhood/being a wife. I don't know how I thought I would really be able to measure this (so much for a SMART goal!) but 2016 was such a struggle to keep it all together that I REALLY wanted to reconnect and be happy in my role as mom and wife. I feel like getting my head above water with the twins (thanks to them being a little older and more independent) had a part to do with that. Also all the other aspects that I focused on this year.
The Old Testament. This was really a two-fold resolution since in 2016 I barely had two spare moments to myself. I only got through up to Leviticus but I was able to take time more mornings than the previous year (usually had to be around 530 am!) to study OT or whatever else I felt like reading. I started off the year working out before the kids woke up, then Drew took that over the second half of the year which was actually a bit of a relief because the mornings are usually the only guaranteed (mostly) time in my day where I can really be alone. It evolved from just studying/reading up to working on my sketchbook, reading other things, doing my Mutu, and just doing things to get ready for the day. Waking up before the kids, sort of like working out, is something that always feels so hard but I NEVER regret doing it. I hope I can get further into the Old Testament this upcoming year.
My Core. It is certainly not as good as it could be, but it is definitely stronger than it was a year ago, and even six months ago when I was still doing crossfit. I think recognizing my limits due to my weakness was a big step in my core recovering. Lifting as heavy as I could and going as hard as I could did not do any good to my core or my pelvic floor. It was definitely a year of trial and (a lot of) error, but it is a work in progress going in the right direction. My 3 finger gap is now down to 1-2, and while I have not been doing Mutu as regularly as I should, I have been going a couple of times to a massage therapist who has been working on realigning my middle, which has made a huge difference. I did manage to gain 10 pounds in 2017, on top of the extra baby weight I was still carrying, but even with that added stress I still feel stronger in my core and like I have more control than I did a year ago.
Gratitude. I kept a daily gratitude journal for a few months leading up to the move in May which I think helped a lot with dealing with a lot of issues that would have upset me more. I have definitely applied this more in my life than I thought I would and am happy to say that while I still had bad days, days that I would sulk and bemoan what was "happening to me", the more that I took control of the situation, assessed it for the good and then worked on what was lacking, I consistently had better days and could enjoy parenting/life in general.
Myself. This was the one that was the most ominous to me. I wanted to figure out what made me happy beyond what I had to do in my day to day life. I was right about the other parts of my resolution helping me along in this quest...Things I discovered about myself this year:
1. I love being a mom. Parenting well does not always come easily to me but the more I choose to love my children unconditionally and treat them in a way that brings us closer together, the more I enjoy it.
2. I love being married to Drew. It's crazy to think that 1/3 of my life I have been with him and most of that time heavily dependent on him, but he's truly been my rock this past year. Moving away from Ohio and then moving to Utah posed so many unseen challenges we did not anticipate and I felt so lucky to have a partner that felt the same way I did. We definitely grew closer in the last year and especially with The Kidney Stone Incident, I feel even more blessed than ever to have him by my side.
3. I love blogging but I no longer live to blog. I only posted 128 times in 2017, which may seem like a lot but compared to all the other years where I average 300, it was a sharp drop, mostly due to the fact that I made a conscious decision (after quitting my blog forever for two weeks only to come back to it!) to blog when I felt appropriate and not worry too much about the timing of it. I don't have deadlines, I don't get paid to blog x number of times a week, so while I find it important to keep up with what is going on with my life in journal form, I am content to post only occasionally (and the last three months only single digits a month!). This does mean that I take less pictures but they are ones that I care more about instead of ones that I delete right after blogging about them.
4. I really like studying, and morning studying before the kids wake up is just amazing. 5:30 always comes too soon and sometimes (like the last two weeks) it falls to the wayside but since I know my twins are never going to sleep in past 7 ( was thrilled they slept in TILL 7 most days over christmas break!!), it feels better to know I have accomplished a few things before everyone is awake.
5. I HATE being late. HATE it. And I am late ALL THE TIME. Guess who found a good new resolution?
6. Art Education really is the best fit for me. I had some serious doubts before coming to Utah but after attending a few Evening for Educators, I am once again hooked. I know that this is something I have a passion for and I am actually looking into getting a Masters in Art Education with an emphasis in Studio Arts after I recertify (which will hopefully happen in the first half of 2019 if all goes well). I love that I have the same schedule as my kids with school and vacations, get good health benefits, and even get paid to do something that comes easy to me and that I love. That holy trifecta balances out the fact that I would never get paid in my job in a lifetime as much as Drew gets paid after 5 years with his company. And I am okay with that!
7. I love making art. And I have missed making art! I just got back into acrylic painting in the last few months and realized just how badly I missed it. I did contour drawings the other day with little a who was befuddled when I was oohing and awwing at how awesome they looked (her words: "they just look weird."). I made artwork for two shows and I am planning on submitting to the Spring Salon as well as the Autumn show in the fall at the Springville Museum of art. Moving into a blank slate of a house has been intimidating but so much fun as the white space is slowly filling in. Then once I felt a little more settled I got back into my sketchbook and have been loving that time back in a creative zone (yet another resolution for next year!).
8. I need one on one time with my kids. Full disclosure: I am a TERRIBLE mom of four kids. I am a pretty decent mom of one. When I try to take the time to have at least a little one on one time a day with each kid, I am a far better parent than when I just try to parent them all at once all day which is exhausting and not at all rewarding (sorry...but not actually sorry its truth!).
9. I've missed reading. I have a nice little pile of books always at my bedside but for the last few years they were unmoved for the most part. I felt like I had to binge and go through the whole book in a day or else not read it at all! How terrible! I am now content to get a few pages in a book or two a day and feel fulfilled. Also reading more chapter books with little d has been fun!
10. I am very interested in food. Obviously. But specifically in planning for emergencies (I started a food storage which officially just has 55 gallons of water and a can of powdered peanut butter that should last till the kids are in college), which I recently got into. I am working currently on a monthly plan where we can set aside money to spend specifically on food storage or emergency essentials, something I started doing in the last few months of the year. I also start a Whole30 on January 1, 2018 to "clean up" my food act, so to speak. While that will not be something that carries the entire year, I did announce to the family (and we mostly agreed) that our multiple treats a day (sometimes, I know it is terrible!) needed to be brought down to one treat/dessert a week, and that we would not be keeping that sort of junk in the house (we could make it!). With little d getting 6 cavities, it was a real reality hit that even though we rarely drink soda or have fruit snacks or juice, all the other junk our kids eat can really damage their teeth as well as their bodies. Also being told by my dermatologist that having psoriasis increases my risk of developing diabetes is a little kick in the backside that I need to change mine and my families eating habits.
So there you have it... 2017 was a wonderful year full of change and I was so grateful to have discovered so much about myself. I already have plans for 2018 to be a year of FOCUS so stay tuned...
Tuesday, January 31, 2017
2017 New Year's Resolutions- January Recap
Genesis? DONE.
I can't say I actually expected that to have such good timing. Granted, I wasn't studying from Genesis every day (I have to share that study time to plan for weekly FHE's or my CTR7 class, and I also try to get in some study from the monthly study guides at TSS), but I did start back at the end of November, and it being one of the few books of the Old Testament I have ever read (Ruth being another one, obviously!), I am blown away by how much I have been able to learn with the assistance of the student and teacher's manual for institute. Yes, it took a lot longer than I expected it to (reading all those ensign articles from the 70's was really a trip! Fascinating but definitely made the study more intensive but at least for me, more enjoyable). It was the first time I have ever started reading something without a specific end time in mind.... this year-long study of the Old Testament for me is about the JOURNEY, not about getting it completed by December 31. So I may only get through half of the OT, and I am okay with that. The things I am learning in the OT has gone hand in hand with what I have to teach my 8 year olds, my children, and what I am learning as I study other gospel subject matter. Everything is connected and that connection is Christ and this gospel plan we have set up for us. It is incredibly well designed and I cannot wait to see what I learn from Exodus in the next couple of weeks. And because I have no visual to show you all those hours spent reading, enjoy this little work of art little a made at the library today (and requested I take a pic of course):
From TSS, I have really had the chance to dig deep on a few topics since November: Obedience, Gratitude, Charity, and now Discipleship. I cannot thank Breanna enough for introducing me to this site and opening my eyes to a new way of study (which has probably been introduced to me before, but this made it much easier in my opinion!).
I started out this OT study mostly in the mornings, before I knew the kids would be awake (and back when I was working out mid-morning at the gym, you know a whopping two weeks ago!), I have since made the official shift to working out at 6am for crossfit (second day, and I love it even more!), I am still figuring out how to get my study in, currently it is during naptime but for the sake of getting more stuff done during naptime, I may have to shift towards before the gym... I'll start tomorrow and see how that goes. Regardless of when I study, I have found that putting it first has blessed my life in ways I never thought possible. I was still running on too little sleep but I was less tired (Still tired!) and my thoughts were pointed in a better direction throughout the day. I still struggled this month with that post-home-from-school-till bedtime routine... it is HARD. My diet (or lack thereof), my temperament, my willpower, everything suffers during those hours (because we spent about 99% of the 6 or so months preceeding it, going outside and playing as soon as school was out! and we would do that till dinnertime!! It was amazing!!) because nothing I offer as activity is ever good enough to quell the whining and the crying and the general cooped-up-edness mood of myself and my kids so we end up watching movies to survive. But I want to do more than survive the winter. I want to enjoy my kids as much as I do the first half of the day for the second half. But it will definitely take a lot of work on my part and I am just barely feeling up to the task. Time will tell. And thankfully, past February, while it is still cold in March we have rain and puddle jumping and not as many freezing temp days that we can get outside and it's all uphill from there.
Where was I going with this?
2017 I definitely have a handle on a few things (depending on the day). I am enjoying my time more with my kids and am working to be better at meal planning and grocery budgeting (not the couponing, just the actual "spend less than I plan on spending, only shop once a week, planning out meals that use up what we have") which in my mind goes hand in hand with eating more healthy (if I only have $$$$, I am not going to spend $ on junk food when I need to spend the $ on good quality foods that will actually fit into our meals or snacks, fill us up and keep us healthy! Because that's what our family NEEDS these winter months, to stay healthy!!). Added incentive to "make those abs in the kitchen" is that what I pay for crossfit exceeds more than I have ever spent at a gym including childcare, so I don't want that money to go to waste!I still have 13 pounds to go to get to the place I was before I had kids (which some days feels like nothing, other days feels insurmountable), but I am determined to take care of it in the next 3 months so that I can get on in my life to worrying about something else for a change. "Losing the baby weight" has literally been on my "to do" list for the last SIX YEARS. I'm over it. My diastasis gap is "only" at a "2" (!!!!), which is totally normal!! It is a welcome relief and also a nice show that what I am doing is working and my core is getting stronger. I have less fears when it comes to doing something to cause injury because I know that my back is better supported by my core than it has been in over two years.
I had a "vision board", inspired by Jenn, that I made at the start of last year. It hung by my bed and it was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing I saw before I went to bed. I loved and hated it depending on how I was doing that day. But overall it helped me and so I hope that this year's board will do the same. 2017's is currently a blank slate, but I am sure it will start filling up over the course of the next few weeks (since I just cleared it off today!). Definitely deciding on simple resolutions and putting them up all over my house, on this blog and where I can see it regularly and be reminded of my goals has been helpful. And I am seeing the increased capacity I've been desperately searching for for years. I am not perfect, but I feel more confident in my ability to make better choices and of course, I am trying, which is the most important part.
"Start Where You Are."
I can't say I actually expected that to have such good timing. Granted, I wasn't studying from Genesis every day (I have to share that study time to plan for weekly FHE's or my CTR7 class, and I also try to get in some study from the monthly study guides at TSS), but I did start back at the end of November, and it being one of the few books of the Old Testament I have ever read (Ruth being another one, obviously!), I am blown away by how much I have been able to learn with the assistance of the student and teacher's manual for institute. Yes, it took a lot longer than I expected it to (reading all those ensign articles from the 70's was really a trip! Fascinating but definitely made the study more intensive but at least for me, more enjoyable). It was the first time I have ever started reading something without a specific end time in mind.... this year-long study of the Old Testament for me is about the JOURNEY, not about getting it completed by December 31. So I may only get through half of the OT, and I am okay with that. The things I am learning in the OT has gone hand in hand with what I have to teach my 8 year olds, my children, and what I am learning as I study other gospel subject matter. Everything is connected and that connection is Christ and this gospel plan we have set up for us. It is incredibly well designed and I cannot wait to see what I learn from Exodus in the next couple of weeks. And because I have no visual to show you all those hours spent reading, enjoy this little work of art little a made at the library today (and requested I take a pic of course):
From TSS, I have really had the chance to dig deep on a few topics since November: Obedience, Gratitude, Charity, and now Discipleship. I cannot thank Breanna enough for introducing me to this site and opening my eyes to a new way of study (which has probably been introduced to me before, but this made it much easier in my opinion!).
I started out this OT study mostly in the mornings, before I knew the kids would be awake (and back when I was working out mid-morning at the gym, you know a whopping two weeks ago!), I have since made the official shift to working out at 6am for crossfit (second day, and I love it even more!), I am still figuring out how to get my study in, currently it is during naptime but for the sake of getting more stuff done during naptime, I may have to shift towards before the gym... I'll start tomorrow and see how that goes. Regardless of when I study, I have found that putting it first has blessed my life in ways I never thought possible. I was still running on too little sleep but I was less tired (Still tired!) and my thoughts were pointed in a better direction throughout the day. I still struggled this month with that post-home-from-school-till bedtime routine... it is HARD. My diet (or lack thereof), my temperament, my willpower, everything suffers during those hours (because we spent about 99% of the 6 or so months preceeding it, going outside and playing as soon as school was out! and we would do that till dinnertime!! It was amazing!!) because nothing I offer as activity is ever good enough to quell the whining and the crying and the general cooped-up-edness mood of myself and my kids so we end up watching movies to survive. But I want to do more than survive the winter. I want to enjoy my kids as much as I do the first half of the day for the second half. But it will definitely take a lot of work on my part and I am just barely feeling up to the task. Time will tell. And thankfully, past February, while it is still cold in March we have rain and puddle jumping and not as many freezing temp days that we can get outside and it's all uphill from there.
Where was I going with this?
2017 I definitely have a handle on a few things (depending on the day). I am enjoying my time more with my kids and am working to be better at meal planning and grocery budgeting (not the couponing, just the actual "spend less than I plan on spending, only shop once a week, planning out meals that use up what we have") which in my mind goes hand in hand with eating more healthy (if I only have $$$$, I am not going to spend $ on junk food when I need to spend the $ on good quality foods that will actually fit into our meals or snacks, fill us up and keep us healthy! Because that's what our family NEEDS these winter months, to stay healthy!!). Added incentive to "make those abs in the kitchen" is that what I pay for crossfit exceeds more than I have ever spent at a gym including childcare, so I don't want that money to go to waste!I still have 13 pounds to go to get to the place I was before I had kids (which some days feels like nothing, other days feels insurmountable), but I am determined to take care of it in the next 3 months so that I can get on in my life to worrying about something else for a change. "Losing the baby weight" has literally been on my "to do" list for the last SIX YEARS. I'm over it. My diastasis gap is "only" at a "2" (!!!!), which is totally normal!! It is a welcome relief and also a nice show that what I am doing is working and my core is getting stronger. I have less fears when it comes to doing something to cause injury because I know that my back is better supported by my core than it has been in over two years.
I had a "vision board", inspired by Jenn, that I made at the start of last year. It hung by my bed and it was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing I saw before I went to bed. I loved and hated it depending on how I was doing that day. But overall it helped me and so I hope that this year's board will do the same. 2017's is currently a blank slate, but I am sure it will start filling up over the course of the next few weeks (since I just cleared it off today!). Definitely deciding on simple resolutions and putting them up all over my house, on this blog and where I can see it regularly and be reminded of my goals has been helpful. And I am seeing the increased capacity I've been desperately searching for for years. I am not perfect, but I feel more confident in my ability to make better choices and of course, I am trying, which is the most important part.
"Start Where You Are."
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