Random pictures from the last two days

Little a with some stickers from grandpa yesterday (if only I could get her to not sing tangled songs quite so loudly during church!!)

Lo FaceTimeing gma Astrid like a pro (she's so gorgeous.... I swear I have more wrinkles than she does!!)

The face I get when dinnertime rolls around and I'm not serving easy mac or ramen with eggs

Cute cute babes!!!!

Sweaty head with a new pillow pet from a sweet friend!

Two (not so) little a's

This morning I was rudely woke up after only FOUR hours and change of sleep. Come on, babies!! I couldn't believe how upset I was, they boys were super irritable all morning (and all day in fact), I was exhausted, the crying was nonstop (which is super awesome by the way when you're trying to wean) and I had no energy for a workout.

Three incredible tender mercies followed that terrible wake up call. 

1- First little d said a prayer at breakfast (right after I sent little Lo to "time out" in his crib for a few minutes because his screaming was driving us all crazyyyy) "to bless everyone but especially mom to be calm and happy today", something I pray for often and it meant so much to hear that and feel the power of his little prayer. It helped me collect myself before retrieving my poor (probably teething) baby. 

2-Then a play date got pushed back right around the time I put the boys down for a nap, drew was home so I put on a movie for the big kids and MAN did it feel good to go for a quick 3 mile run outside in the sun, getting some serious endorphins. Then I came home (to a crying Lo, naturally) and I was happy and even though nothing about my circumstances changed, I felt 100% better. 

3-We played outside and walked to school and I managed to simultaneously nap all three kids for 45 solid minutes so I could sneak a nap.

Moral of the story? While it would be easier to pray to request these burdens are taken (far far away) from me, when I pray for assistance to power through and "endure it well", my burdens are most certainly made light.

When it rains it pours (the twins two month checkups)

I was in the shower this morning when I heard the screaming. It had been off and on all morning due to fighting so i didn't pay it much mind... Lan had woken up at 7, so I brought him to my bed to snuggle for an hour till he got hungry, fed him, got Lo and fed him, and by then it was almost 9 and the big kids were starting to wake up (a sleep in? Total miracle!!) so I told them I would get a quick shower and left the boys sleeping on my bed with the bedroom door locked so I didn't have to worry about the big kids doing anything to the babies.

After my five minute shower, I opened the door to see what was going on and little a was crying in a way I had only seen once before, and had a firm grip on her right elbow... Nursemaids elbow yet again! Gah!!! Little d explained she was trying to open the bedroom door which I had locked so she hung on the doorknob with her right arm and popped it out of her socket again. I soothed her as best I could as I called the doctors office to see if they could squeeze her in with the boys that morning who were due to have a two month checkup and shots at 10:15. I was planning on dropping off the big kids at a friends house at 9:45 but instead only dropped off little d just after 9 and I headed to the pediatrician with little a continuously creaming in the backseat. No, I didn't manage to buckle her completely. But after properly buckling and then having to unbuckle her the last time this happened it was a risk I was willing to take, it was not worth it to me to make her situation any worse than it already was.

We made it, Dr. B reset her elbow back into her socket and all was right in the world. She even got a Popsicle! (And was a lot happier than she looks!)

"Wow, When it rains it pours, huh?" Was the welcome I got from Dr. B when j walked into the office pushing the double stroller and holding a screaming toddler. And you know what? he was right.

I remembered to restock the diaper bag the night before.

I remembered and grabbed the two ziplock bags of Cheerios for breakfast that the kids hadn't eaten that past Sunday in church. And I grabbed a partially eaten clif bar for myself I nearly threw away the other day, from the pantry.

We already had a doctors appointment  that morning so I was already planning on a trip to the pediatrician.

Over the phone the nurse made it sound like we may have to wait a few hours for someone to see little a, but the receptionist recognized nursemaids elbow since both her boys had had it and got us in as soon as we got there... A full hour before my scheduled appointment.

I was able to keep my cool and recognize what was wrong with little a in the first place, saving us a trip to the urgent care.

I know I said back in December how grateful I was that the whole debacle happened while I was "only" pregnant and wouldn't have two extra kids to tow around. But to be honest this time around was wayyyyy easier because I knew what to do, I could easily carry her, we could talk to each other and she could tell me what was wrong, and little d ( the most sweet loving and also emotional kid of the family) could be in someone else's care and not crying alongside His sister.

Both boys managed their shots wonderfully. Cried for about two seconds each and fell right asleep.

Lan is 12 lbs 8 oz and 22 inches tall,

Lo is 11 lbs 2 oz and almost 24 inches tall. Both average around the 50%ile for heads, height and weight.

So yes indeed---When it rains it pours, and sometimes you do not have enough room in your heart to contain the outpouring of blessings.

Remembering to count all my blessings today.

my first day in over a year without chocolate. and dairy.

Last night/this morning was THE WORST. I know I have probably said that about a dozen times over the course of the last month but seriously. Poor Lan had me up most of the night and all morning as usual and he was simply miserable. It was making me wonder if the medication was doing him any good at all.

So early this morning I made the executive decision that for the next week or so I was cutting out chocolate (in hopes of allowing him to sleep more, maybe the caffeine was affecting his sleeping?) and dairy (one of the highest culprits in the sensitive baby stomach problem arena). This, coming from a girl who routinely eats breakfast as late as noon, and usually sneaks in a chocolate chip cookie or 3 while she is making said breakfast... maybe that's my problem. Also, cheese. I haven't been took keen on milk since I did whole30 least year, or cereal for that matter (that was thanks to when I did Bob Harper's Skinny rules back in 2012) which is the only way I usually have milk anyway.

Today. I missed cheese. And cottage cheese with clementines. And very desperately, chocolate. Which I totally made up for by eating way too much bread. At least I'm not really on whole30 or paleo, which I swore I would never do, and up until today I never thought I would ever swear off any food again. But I did.

(Self inflicted wounds from when he gets upset and scratches at everything including himself)
And it was 100% worth it to see my sweet little never-napping boy take the longest nap of his little life... 4 hours from 3pm-7pm (before that his longest nap during the day was all of about 10 minutes tops and I wish I were kidding), and to give him a bath tonight without him completely freaking out screaming like he usually does. I don't know if it is a personality change from feeling a bit more comfortable or just leftover nap-lag from his epic nap earlier, but I felt comforted in my decision to make such a little sacrifice for him.

(Dinner... Looks pretty whole30/paleo to me)
During the day has been just as hard (maybe harder?) than at night since the babies came home, and I will be honest, it is mostly because of Lan. Lo is able to fall asleep on his own and Lan has just never been able to, so as a result I am rarely without a baby in my arms during the day--either feeding, changing, or just holding, mostly the latter with Lan, trying to get him to burp or just position him to be more comfortable. Having my MiL in town the last two weeks means I have had an extra set of hands to share the baby holding but she leaves tomorrow so we will see how things go down after that point... I will certainly miss my in house housekeeper, babysitter, friend/advisor, chauffeur, launderer and cook. I've been terribly spoiled for longer than I deserve. Tomorrow marks the end of the helpful visits (until Anna's visit for a few days next month) so the training wheels come off to a Certain extent since I will still have my mom and sister 20 mins away.

Being a twin mom is not easy. I never expected it to be, but I also had no idea how difficult it was going to be. Thankfully we are so so close to rounding that corner of when the babies will start smiling and interacting with us, and at no time in my mommying life has that bright spot been needed than now.

Also a quick side note I wanted to remember... for the last 3 years that Drew has worked for his current company, he has always been sent out of town at some point for the last week of the month. This month was the first time ever that they had not needed him (he requested time off last month so he would not have to travel when the babies were so young), and I am extremely grateful that while he cannot feed the boys and most of the time does not even wake up when they wake up at night, having him by my side and occasionally rubbing my back as I am nursing or offering to help with a diaper change or to hold a baby, it means the world to me. Tender mercies of the Lord, such little insignificant things each day that really add up to a happy mama.

Here's to a possibility of a consistently happier baby boy!

You know it must be just about daylight savings time when

Both your kids have been consistently sleeping in till 8am or later, which has never happened before. And has also never been needed more before in my life. Nine hours of sleep and I still wake up just as tired as when I went to bed. And as I know from four years of it, daylight savings is guarenteed to make my children wake up at least as hour or two earlier than they were pre-DST. It's a known fact. So.... Bracing myself ;)

But that's life. And I feel so blessed to have these sweet smart things call me mama and for them to the the last face I see before I go to bed and the first faces I see when I wake up in the morning. Now if only I could harness their energy and spunk first thing in the morning...

This. Morning.

7:30 I hear little d wake up, tap my shoulder and ask me if he goes #2 in my bathroom if I would help him clean up. I agree and five minutes later we are both washing hands and I am whispering bribes of "you can watch pbs this morning as long as you like if it doesn't wake up sister!" So, he sneaks downstairs, and I sneak back in my room for a glorious 45 more minutes of sleep... Then little a wakes up with shouts of "mommyyyyyyy up!" Meaning, help me out of this crib ASAP mom. So I lift her out and sneak back into bed.

 Some mornings are good mornings and I leap out of bed and throw on my workout clothes and start getting the kids ready for the day. Today was no such morning. Two weeks of (me) not napping was starting to wear its toll on me, and this morning was so hard to get my butt out of bed. Thankfully we had a dentist appointment late morning so that was my excuse for not going to the gym. Little a ran around the upstairs for awhile, joined me in bed to look for my hidden phone and try to find daddy under the covers (he was in West Virginia), then heard the curious George theme song and raced (as fast as you can while sliding on your stomach down the stairs) downstairs to "watch" with her brother.

And then something amazing happened.

Usually if and when this happens it is punctuated by screaming, a meltdown or two, heated arguments about the remote, etc. But today, for a full 30 minutes while I lay in bed trying to convince myself to get out of my pajamas, there was no such thing. My kids, who never stop pushing each other's buttons from sunrise to sunset, didn't fight for a full half hour and lt was amazing!!!! Especially hearing little a announcing. "Up!" Every time she wanted to sit on the couch and little d grunting as he lifted her hefty body on the couch. And they didn't even try to eat any food while in the "living room", since me adding that new rug meant that new rules that that room is officially a no-food zone. It may not happen often but I love when my children are obedient!

I know it will probably never happen again but I felt it needed to be documented.

Tender mercies indeed.